It’s almost the end of your workday and you are exhausted. You are moments away from turning off your computer when Lila, one of your employees, suddenly barges through the door and starts burning your ears with a host of complaints.
Your head is swarming from all the negativity and emotions packed into Lila’s complaints. How do you respond?
Most of the time, complaints are made in the heat of the moment when emotions are high. Although you really want to roll your eyes and downplay anything that comes out of Lila’s mouth right now, you may be able to reshape her complaints into constructive feedback.
But is the timing right? It depends on whether hers and your emotions are under control and there is sufficient time to discuss issues thoroughly. Otherwise, the conversation may become confrontational.
When you both feel calm and composed, meaning neither person is visibly upset or angry, consider giving Lila some constructive feedback and ask for the same in return.
Constructive feedback is meant to be developmental where someone highlights areas for improvement. To be constructive, the feedback should be specific, actionable, and focused on behaviors or results rather than personal attributes.
Giving constructive feedback for professional development requires the following:
Constructive criticism focuses on specific examples and details to support your feedback. Vague or general feedback lacks clarity and may not be actionable.
For example, “Your abrupt entry into my office at the end of the day yesterday caught me off guard. In the future, please knock or set up a meeting so I can give you my undivided attention.”
While highlighting strengths is important, addressing areas for improvement is equally crucial. For example: “You are very punctual to team meetings. During those meetings, please allow your coworkers to share their ideas.”
Frame feedback using "I" statements to take ownership of your perspective and avoid sounding accusatory. For example, say "I observed that..." instead of "You always...”
Keep your feedback centered on observable behaviors and actions. Avoid making judgments about an employee's character or personality.
In most situations, feedback should be given promptly after the behavior is observed for it to be relevant and useful.
When providing constructive feedback, suggest viable solutions or actions the employee can take to improve. For example: “You can help our meetings stay on point by sharing the agenda in the meeting invite.”
Encourage employees to share their perspectives and ask for their input. A collaborative discussion can lead to a better understanding of feedback.
Approach feedback with empathy and respect. Use language that is non-confrontational and focuses on improvement, not destructive criticism. For example: “Your report was highly informative, but I noticed a few errors. Let’s skim it together to identify the issues and work on accuracy.”
Be open to the employee's response and ask for their perspective. Active listening fosters a two-way dialogue and encourages understanding.
Maintain professionalism and respect during feedback discussions. Avoid personal attacks and negative emotions.
But giving tactful feedback is just half the equation; it is also important that you receive feedback well.
To win control over your innate fight-or-flight response to feedback that may come across as negative criticism, practice the following tips.
Approach critical feedback with an open mind and a willingness to learn. When you think about Olympic athletes, they rely on feedback with every repetition to help them be successful.
Seek clarification if you do not fully understand the feedback. For example, “Tell me more about that…” shows that you value their input and want to improve.
When you receive constructive criticism, reflect on the feedback and consider how it aligns with your own self-assessment. Use feedback as an opportunity for self-improvement.
Instead of becoming defensive or dismissive of input, express gratitude for the feedback and ask for specific recommendations. For example, “I did not realize that my tone was upsetting the other department, thank you for letting me know! How can I tidy things up there?”
If the feedback is constructive, develop an action plan to address the areas for improvement. For example, “You have given me a lot to think about here, and I appreciate that. Do you mind if I take a week to digest this and come back to you with an action plan?”
Regardless of the nature of the feedback, express gratitude to the person providing it. Acknowledging feedback shows respect for the effort taken to help you improve.
Keep the lines of communication open by following up on your progress and seeking additional feedback as you make improvements.
Remember that both constructive and destructive criticism present opportunities for growth.
Turning complaints into constructive feedback is a skill that can significantly improve communication and problem-solving in both personal and professional settings. In our initial example with Lila, here are tips for taking her initial complaints and asking questions to receive effective feedback.
By following these steps, you can transform complaints into opportunities for personal and professional growth and improvement, fostering a more positive and productive environment.
While addressing issues as they arise is important, implementing regular feedback surveys can help gather constructive criticism in a more structured and less emotionally charged way. These surveys can provide employees with the opportunity to share their thoughts and concerns anonymously, encouraging more honest and reflective responses.
Alternatively, you can also offer a non-anonymous option for those who are comfortable identifying themselves, which allows for more direct follow-up and accountability. Providing both options can increase participation and ensure you receive valuable, actionable feedback, helping to address issues before they escalate.
For more tips on giving and receiving constructive criticism, contact your certified HR expert. Not a current Stratus HR client? Book a free consultation and our team will contact you shortly.